Talking to your child
How to start and keep conversations going
Talking to your child about worries, relationships or safety can feel difficult, especially if you’re concerned they may be at risk. Many parents worry about saying the wrong thing or making things worse.
The most important thing to remember is that open, calm conversations help children feel safe to talk, even if they don’t open up straight away.
What helps when talking to your child
Young people tell us it helps when adults:
- Stay calm and listen
- Ask questions without judgement
- Don’t panic or jump to conclusions
- Reassure them they are not in trouble
- Keep checking in, even if they don’t talk at first
You don’t need to have all the answers. Being available and supportive matters more than getting it perfect.
Starting the conversation
You might find it helpful to:
- Choose a quiet moment with no pressure
- Start with what you’ve noticed, not what you fear
- Use open questions
For example:
- “I’ve noticed you seem a bit different lately, how are things going?”
- “You don’t seem yourself at the moment. Is there anything you want to talk about?”
- “I’m here to listen if something’s worrying you.”
During the conversation
Try to:
- Listen more than you speak
- Accept what they say, even if it’s hard to hear
- Avoid blaming language
- Be honest about needing to get help if they’re not safe
If your child doesn’t want to talk, that’s okay. Let them know:
- You’re there whenever they’re ready
- You’ll keep checking in
- They’re not alone
If your child shares something concerning
- Thank them for telling you
- Reassure them they’ve done the right thing
- Let them know it’s not their fault
- Explain what will happen next, calmly and clearly
Young people are more likely to speak up again when they feel believed and supported.
Important to Remember:
- Children may not recognise they are being exploited
- They may feel loyalty, fear or shame
- Sharing their experience is often gradual, not immediate
Keeping conversations open can help reduce risk and make it easier for your child to ask for help when they need it.